Confession: in 2012, I burnt out…

Hey there,

It started with panic attacks… I would be lying in bed trying to sleep and hear a small noise and shoot out of bed. I was in a long distance relationship so I would call my boyfriend in a panic and he would tell me to call someone who was close by. Someone who could bike over and give me a hug and tell me everything was going to be okay.

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How walking in the forest can help to save the world!

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As soon as we were all seated he wrote “I’m a Pinko Commie” on the blackboard. I was in grade 12 and the class was World Issues. I thought, “Who is this teacher? And what is he talking about?”

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Sometimes I feel lonely…

I’ve been writing a lot about career coaching stuff. About what you can do and how I can help. And I believe it. I believe that you are meant to bring out your gifts and touch even more people than you already are.

But I’ve been craving to write about me. About my life. About how life is hard sometimes and how sometimes I don’t know how to make it better.

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Don’t Quit Your Day Job, Make Your Escape Plan

When I was 24, I quit my day job. I worked for a non-profit with youth in custody. I was stressed, worried I wasn’t doing enough, burning out. And it was absolutely the right decision to quit. I moved to an ashram, learned more about my mind and my spirit and returned to the workforce stronger and more clear about my purpose.

Sometimes quitting is the right thing to do, but this article is about the other times. Maybe you’re a little bit older or wiser than I was. Maybe you have student debt or you don’t want to leave your community. Maybe’s there’s a mortgage or kids or both. This article is about when it’s not time to quit, but your job really isn’t working so it’s time to do something.

Here are the Six Steps to Make Your Escape Plan.
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I can’t be perfect anymore…

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When a friend comes to me because they’re upset about something I did, I want to say the right thing. So I think and think and analyze the facts. How can I take responsibility for what happened? How can I be mature about this situation? How can I address this in a way that makes my friend feel heard?

I am trying to be perfect. The perfect friend, daughter, sister, employee, partner. And so I want to say the perfect thing.

But I’m realizing, when I try to say the perfect thing, I sacrifice saying the true thing. And by focusing only on the other person’s experience, I give up myself.

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The Unexpected and Beautiful

I felt empowered by my decision to drop out of teacher’s college but when I woke up new years day in 2011, I was terrified. I had spent new years eve with a couple of friends and that was the last concrete plan that I had. I woke up with the expanse of my whole life in front of me and no idea what to do…

I was living in Thunder Bay, my roommates were cool, rent was cheap so I decided to stay. I went back to the drawing board, surfing the internet and hitting the pavement. Searching for a job that felt meaningful. I drank Baileys in my tea in the morning and begged my busy friends to go tobogganing with me.

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Friends, I made a mistake.

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I launched a course called the Month of Courage and a few weeks after, I didn’t feel good about it.

Sometimes I set the date and that helps me to get my butt in gear to produce. But this time, that didn’t happen. This time, when I thought about working on the course, it felt like a heavy burden. This time, it was bad.

Continue reading “Friends, I made a mistake.”